The End of the World!

Hahahahahahahahaha!!!

Now that I've given you my condensed opinion, I shall elaborate.

I've known about the Mayan calendar since way before it became The Main Topic. I never saw it as anything to freak out about, and there are so many reasons why. To start with, let's say that the Mayans really did see this as the last age of human kind. Well, guess what, for them, it was. Their culture is no more. Congrats, Mayans! :P

So, moving right along...

How many times has the End of the World passed us by now? I lose count! But here are some of the biggies:

1) During the first few decades after the departure of Christ, the New Testament records the belief that the world would end before "this generation" had passed away. Paul believed this emphatically. The 1st century AD, as we now record it, came and went...but the 2nd century replaced it, and the 3rd, and the 4th, and the 5th, and the 6th...and by then I'm pretty sure that particular 1st century generation had in fact passed away. Unless there are immortals still walking the universe who lived in that time period. Or maybe trees count too, in which case we are still in danger from this one, and Jesus will return to kill us before the final remaining 1st century tree has passed away.

2) Now how 'bout that 7th century? Numerous people were convinced that the end would come in the clearly demonic year of 666 AD. How could it not? I mean, we've all read the book of Revelation, and we know that this number is bad news, right?

Incidentally, the concept of counting from "1 AD" didn't exist until 525 AD, at which point it would have otherwise been the year 1277 on the Roman calendar that existed in Jesus' time, or 4427/4428 according to the Hebrew calendar that existed, in a slightly rougher form, in the time of Jesus. PS - The book of Revelation was also written in the 1st century AD, when, as noted, the concept of it even being the 1st century AD did not exists at all.

So, what happened in 666 AD? Well...nothing really. A couple of notable abbeys were built...and then the world moved on to 667 without so much as a peep from "killer Jesus," Prince of Peace.

3) So all was well until that last year of numerically certain doom was turned upside-down in 999, and everyone feared the year 1000 AD! Surely after 1,000 years (actually 967 years after the Crucifixion/Resurrection, but who's counting?), loving Lord Jesus would return to destroy us all at last! But alas, after January 1...the world just kept on going, and later that year, Leif Ericson discovered America, but that's another story and shall be blogged about another time. Let us proceed with our numbers of doom!

4) I am skipping all of the little guys-holding-up-signs-every-day prophesies of doom, because they are always with us. Really, there seems to be an End Times prophesy for every day of every year if you look hard enough! Just sayin'. I'm also ignoring Nostradamus, because his prophesies are, in my opinion, stupid and just as impossible to accurately decipher as is the notorious and ever vexing book of Revelation.

5) Holy crap! Y2K (2000 AD for those not up on the lingo of the time)! The computers are all going to crash, the world is going to go down with them! Arnold Schwarzenegger starred in a movie about it! It's gonna happen! Oh yeah, and as if that weren't enough, Killer Jesus arrives at the stroke of midnight January 1! I was actually there for this one. And I wasn't buying any of it. I was the only one of my friends who didn't bother to get my computer Y2K-proofed before the big crash. It was commonly believed that all computers would go nuts when the year 1999 rolled over digitally to the year 2000, since our extremely advanced (for the time) computers most likely wouldn't know what the heck a "2" was doing in that first space now. I was unconvinced, and I was right. I laughed at them all when I got on my computer just after midnight and nothing had changed...except for the date, which read "January 1, 2000" without having destroyed the world. Then I laughed at the silly twits who were waiting in the dark for Killer Jesus to swoop down on a cloud and devour them all, in the name of a calendar that didn't exist until 492 years after his earthly ministry.

So, now it's 2012 AD, and the Mayan calendar runs out on December 21, and silly humans are once again in a frenzy over it, preparing to die. Even Killer Jesus, Prince of Peace, is expected to have an interest in the Mayan calendar for his long anticipated, bloodthirsty return, despite the fact that he lived in the Roman province of Judaea, an ocean away from the Mayans, about 967 years before Leif Ericson even discovered America and would therefore not likely have had any reason to use their then completely-unknown-to-the-Roman-Empire Mayan calendar when referencing the date of the End of the World, which, as it happens, he claimed not to have any real knowledge about anyway, but who cares about silly little details like that when the Mayan calendar ends in 2012! You better watch out! You better not cry! You better be good for goddness' sake, because Jesus is coming to kill you on December 21!  Just ask any of your dumbest friends. They'll let you know it's all true.

I've been meaning to take bets with these people. I would bet anyone absurd amounts of money that the world will not end on December 21, 2012 AD. If I win, they will then owe me said absurd amounts of money. If they win, I will owe them nothing, because we'll all be in the belly of Killer Jesus at last, and the world will have come to an end, along with its ever frustrating economy.

The point is, dwelling on the End of the World is no fun. I'm for enjoying every day as it comes. The world could end right now for all we know. The world could end a few billion years from now. Heck, the world might not end at all, ever. Enjoy life. Embrace today. Endings happen all the time, but every ending leads to a new beginning. I shall spend my energy focused on these ever present new beginnings, because when the end comes for any of us, frankly, it's all over, isn't it? Why waste time sitting under our desks in the fetal position waiting for it to arrive, when we could be making the best of every moment up until it does?

And for the record, I think the entire concept of "Killer Jesus" returning to end the world is far fetched. I could go on here, but that's another blog entirely, and a far more theologically dense one at that. The Mayans said nothing of Killer Jesus. It just seems to be something that so many people around me believe in with such fervor. It bothers me. It's weird. And there's nothing solid in any Scripture to support it. Spare me your trippy quotes from the book of Revelation, please. I could write a whole blog on that book too, and perhaps at some point I shall.

Meanwhile...any takers on my bet? I'll bet anyone 1,212 cacao beans (ancient Mesoamerican currency) right now that the world will still be here for Christmas day on December 25. ;) Let's embrace and love the world and do all within our power to better it. After all, we are going to be here a while, and I for one am glad of it. :)

Glenn